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Thursday, December 6, 2012

Mommy Misdemeanors

photo credit: stockfreeimages.com
Come on. You know we've all been caught a time or two by our kids. Just when we think we're in the clear; their little backs are turned; they can't see what we're about to do, WHAM! We get totally and completely HAD by a three-year-old.  "Mommy! Why did you throw my art in the trash can?! That was 'pecial!" (Crap, Crap, CRAP!)

Let's be real, I can't keep every single coloring of a bird in a tree surrounded by stick figures. The little dude cranks out about 20 different renditions a day! Thus I find myself inevitably caught trying to trash version 16 in the garbage as I hang my head in shame and feel like a complete failure as a mommy for not treasuring each and every gift my little Picasso sends my way.

All of us commit misdemeanors. Some of them may be more monumental in our minds than throwing away yet another dried macaroni artwork. Sometimes we lose our tempers, raise our voices, finish posting one last facebook status before we change that poopy diaper. Sometimes we look away from the baby for a moment at the precise second when he learns to roll over, and then, horrified, watch him fall from the changing table. We've all tucked a watercolored-smudged child into bed without a dunk in the tub. And we've all (like today) tried to hide another crayon drawing deep underneath the newspaper in the garbage only later to learn that it was his "best ever" and he wanted to frame it. (Meanwhile, we hear the garbage man idling half a block away, the treasure crumpled and torn somewhere below it's enormous jaws.)  We've all done things like forget to show up for a "Walk-A-Thon" at the elementary school when all the other mom's were there to walk hand-in-hand with their kindergartner. We've all misjudged a situation and punished our child for something that he didn't do.  (Or maybe that's just all the ones I've committed lately.)

Disrespecting my little Van Gogh's talent is just one of the countless sins I've committed as a mother. The one that is not so very dramatic, but fills me with the most shame , is when I fail to listen and truly be present with my little monsters. It's the crime I most frequently commit.

Our days as parents teem with everyday tasks related to our kiddos physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual needs. We cut fingernails, pack lunches, schedule doctors appointments, give hugs, teach manners, and do laundry. With so much on our plates, we're bound to mess up. All the dirty little secrets I've shared today still stem from a loving parent. But we mess up. No one is perfect, but when our kids see us in the midst of a failure, it's also important that they see us take a breath, apologize, and accept the grace given to us from a loving God. They need to see us admit we are guilty of these "mommy misdemeanors" and start over, and over, and over again. It's one of the best lessons we can give them.

9 comments:

  1. Can so relate. My daughter is 9 and loves art. Well most of her art right now is all the same. Pretty much same pictures over and over and like you....about 20 variations a day. Uffda. What to do....???

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    1. Ya know, Julie, I started a keepsake bin and now when my K-er brings home his folder brimming with papers and crafts every Friday, I have him pick out two things that he did that were his "favorite" and we keep those and throw the rest away. This helps HIM be the decision maker in regards to all the CRAP that piles up. :) Maybe that could help you with your little Picasso!

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  2. I think I could wallpaper an entire room with all of the artwork that my four year old makes. She attaches guilt to all of them. "Mommy I made this for you because I love you so much." "Mommy, this is so you won't cry" (Because I've been a real fun dudette the last month or so-that's sarcasm.) Some days I am able to choose the precious ones, but lately there is a pile in the other room that just keeps getting bigger and bigger and bigger. Every surface in my house is covered with artwork! The couple of times I have been caught disposing of her artwork, her reaction just about killed me. It was like Suzy Loo Who on "How the Grinch Stole Christmas "Santyclaus, WHY?" Only it was "Mommy, I made that for you." complete with tears in her eyes.

    I found myself reasoning with my seven year old about why i don't keep every stinkin paper that comes home from school. I told him I keep the special stuff. He wasn't convinced. If I hadn't brought up the episode of Spongebob where he tries to keep everything and he can't fit in his house anymore, I may not have dodged that little meltdown.

    I had a blog post I wanted to share with you about all of the artwork in my house, but of course I can't find it. It's probably buried in all of the art.

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  3. http://sadderbutwiser.wordpress.com/2012/09/19/a-zamboni-shall-lead-them-when-art-takes-over/

    Found it.

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    1. SWEEEEEEET! I'm looking this up right now! Thanks for the comments and encouragement. I know we've all been here but it's so nice to get to hear others frustrations too. I feel like breaking into a rendition of "You are not alone. . .I am here for you. . ." by Micheal Jackson right now. . . :)

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  4. I do think it is so important to acknowledge when we mess up and work through that. I think it teaches them how to do so. I also believe strongly in the verse "Above all love each other deeply for love covers over a multitude of sins" 1st Peter 4:8. I need this done for me.

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  5. I actually did keep every single paper and picture from Lil Duck's first year of preschool. I simply couldn't keep up this year. Thankfully I have the opportunity to dunk stuff in the trash can the couple of days of the week that she is visiting her father. :D

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    1. Ducky, you're a brave woman. I might've drown under the weight of all the artwork! Thanks for reading!

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