Thursday, February 14, 2013

Your Kids Are Never Too Young To Start Dating

Yes, you read that correctly. I don't think any child is too young to start dating. They need the connection, the intimacy, the companionship and significance that a dating relationship brings. You may think that your 12-year-old daughter or 9-year-old son is too young to be entrusted with that kind of "special relationship", but you would be wrong. Take it from this mom! I have a PhD in parenting and while I'll stand and hold your hand as they venture out into this frightening world of "dating", you must know that they are, in fact, never too young to date.

Because, you see, I believe that that YOU should start dating your kids WAY BEFORE anyone else does.

Before any of their peers try to meet that need they have for connection and intimacy. Before anyone else tries to steal their companionship away from you or fulfill their craving for significance; YOUR child needs to feel all those emotions from the ones who brought them into this world. They need to feel special and understand their worth when their Mom or Dad takes the time to invest, one-on-one with them in a situation much like they will face when they do finally reach "dating age" (which, in case you were wondering, for my boys, is 35-years-old!).

As one who didn't have a father who invested in my life as a child and a teenager, I struggled with "dating relationships" throughout life. I built up walls, or at times, gave in a little more than I should in order to find the sense of worth and significance that I lacked at home. So many of our kids struggle as I did. They didn't have parents who PURSUED them. My husband and I have made it our mission to PURSUE our kids, with the same passion and determination as a young stud pursues the prom queen (but with A LOT better motives!).

This Valentine's Day, you should have the same mentality. If YOU are not the ones pursuing your children, they will find someone else to find that connection with. Let them learn how to "date" because they've been shown what true intimacy is, ultimate fulfillment is, by watching the way you pour out the love of Jesus into their lives through your endless pursuit after their hearts for years. Here are ways that you can do this:

Read the rest of this post over at EpicParent today! Click on over and leave me your comments. . .


8 comments:

  1. The title of this post totally grabbed my attention;) I had to find out more. Love it. So very, very true. If we don't fill our kids "love-cups" they will start looking elsewhere. and that would be bad. Happy Valentin's Day!

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    1. So glad you read this post!! Thanks for the encouragement! Happy Valentine's Day to you too!

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  2. I did this when my children were young. They remember things about these times I do not which makes me feel good that those times meant something to them. It really did not matter what we did just so we were one on one. I had to make mayself a schedule in order to do it consistently.

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    1. So glad you did this with your kids and saw results! I wish my dad would have understood this concept and am sooooo grateful that I have a husband so devoted to my kids. We are starting this tradition and I know it's going to be some of the most memorable times to look back on later on. :)

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  3. My dad would take me on dates when I was growing up. Not super often really. But those are far and away the times I remember most with him. And to this day, my relationship with my dad is pretty rock solid.

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    1. That is so great that you had those moments with your dad. I wish I could say the same, but I can change history repeating itself and start the tradition with my own kids. :) Thanks for the comment Ash!

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