Tuesday, December 18, 2012

For a Reason and For a Season

Guest posts are so much fun, especially when they come from one of your best friends! Deanna Layman is the voice behind the blog Raising Inspiration, where she speaks about uncovering life lessons from parenting and living with lupus, a disease that is rather new in her life's journey. She inspires me in real life, as we meet together every Wednesday for spiritual encouragement and bible study. She also cracks me up! Today, I've asked her to write about being on both sides of the Great Mom Debate (staying home vs. working). As another mom who's seen both sides, she currently finds herself on a "Path Unexpected". Enjoy her insight today, and I will be back in the writing saddle on Thursday with a new Christmas post for you! 
Being a working mom is rather redundant. Whether you work full time outside the home or stay home with the kiddos, they both equally come with joys, challenges, good days and bad. I know this pretty well since I have been on both sides of the fence. When I quit my job a month before my son was born, the intention was for me to be a stay at home mom. This was all I ever wanted to be. I loved every single minute of being home with him.... yes, even on those "cranky-everything-is-going-wrong" kind of days. I loved being home. I found so much joy in being there to watch him grow, learn to walk, feed himself and all the funny things he did that made me bust into laughter on a daily basis. Honestly. if I had my way, I would still be a stay-at-home-mom, but sometimes God just takes you on a road you never thought you would travel.
I don't know what the future looks like, but right now God has placed me on the unexpected path of going back to work. Like I said earlier, staying home or working full time both come with amazing joys and challenges. No one situation is perfect. Every day is different for me. Sometimes the challenges start bright and early when my son wakes up cranky and doesn't want to get ready for the day. It's days like this that make me miss those leisurely mornings we once had where we had nothing on our agenda and there was no need to rush. Other mornings everything goes smoothly and we are off to a great start.
There are days when I look at the clock and see that it is close to nap time and I miss reading him books and tucking him into bed. One thing that makes it better is the fact that his preschool is in the same building as my job, so occasionally I get to go upstairs, give him a hug and tell him how much I love him. There is nothing better than a break in the day when you can fill it with the smile of your child!  When I started working again, I  was often asked why made that decision.  The only answer I have to give is that in this moment, it's what God wanted. He is guiding me down this path and he blessed me with a great place to work. Taking my child with me everyday as well.... how much better could it be? There is definitely no denying how much my son is learning at his preschool, he has begun singing his ABC's, learning shapes and colors and so much more. I am amazed at all that he has learned.
There are so many debates between whether moms should stay home or work full time. There is no perfect scenario or answer. There were days that I had cabin fever when I stayed home, and now the biggest thing I struggle with is having energy. In April I was diagnosed with Lupus, and while some days I feel like my normal self, I have other days that I am fatigued and feel guilty for being so tired when I get home. Here is what it boils down to, I am not a bad mom for working, not even when I get tired from my disease, nor was I  a bad mom for having cabin fever when I was staying at home. We are so hard on ourselves as mothers. All that is important is that we follow the path that God puts before us and give our children our all. Working mom, stay-at-home mom; we are all the same. There will always be challenges and the grass may always look greener on the other side, but we must be confident that we are exactly where God has put us for a season and for a reason!
If you would like to check out Deanna's blog, click on over to Raising Inspiration. You can also connect with her online through Facebook and Twitter.  Don't miss Thursday for an all new post: An Entitled Mom's Plea to Santa Clause. Until then, love on those little monsters with every fiber of your being and help make this Christmas meaningful for them! May all be calm, all be bright where you are today! :)


  1. So nice! I've done both as well and share the same sentiments! Well done! :)

  2. I have too. It's honestly hard being on either side. You feel torn constantly. Thanks for reading!

  3. Love love love this. Needed this today....thank you

  4. Thanks ladies definitely blessed to share my story.