Monday, October 15, 2012

God Is Running Late

As a mom, punctuality is not generally our strong suit. It's not because we don't want it to be. It's not even because we are incapable of it. I'd like to believe it is because of a simple three-letter hindrance. . .K-I-D. Plain and simple, they always seem to know even the stealthest of stealth techniques for ruining a perfectly good fashionably tardy ticket anywhere. Without fail, I will awake in the morning with three hours to spare before an appointment. Plenty of time, I tell myself. It never fails that as I am walking out the door ON TIME, someone will poop his pants, let the dog escape out the front door to run rampant in the neighborhood, or flood the house somehow. And so, my track record for being the "girl-who-has-been-late-since-giving-birth" continues. I will walk into my appointment, frazzled and out-of-breath with profuse apologies and promises that "said catastrophe" will never happen again. We all know it will though, don't we ladies. . .

Lately, God's been running late too.

I feel like I'm the single friend, peering at my watch every 30 seconds, wondering when and if He's going to show up. I'll do what she does and act like it doesn't bother me that He's not "on-schedule" for the appointment I thought we made. After all, it's not like I can be mad. It's just lunch.  But it isn't just lunch sometimes, is it? Sometimes what we are waiting for, what I am currently waiting for is something that He promised to me and I just feel like He couldn't possibly be using His time less wisely. I'm ready to get this show on the road. I'm ready to be what He called me to be, do what He called me to do, and tackle this huge mission and passion that He's placed on my heart and yet all I can do is just sit back and tap my foot and wait for Him to show up and take me on to the next phase in this life journey. I feel "stood up" at times by God. I feel like I'm "on-hold".  I feel like God is just running late.

And then He enlightens me. And do I ever feel like an impatient toddler when He reveals that TIME is the greatest way He is testing my faith in Him.

Sometimes He holds us in places that are invariably NOT our "promised lands". We are ready for God's leading and direction into the next phase of our life, the part we've been waiting in anticipation for, and we follow eagerly only to be led into a place of uncertainty. "This can't be it, God. This isn't part of the plan. This stop wasn't on the map."  Invariably, following God can initially seem to get us into bigger messes than we thought we were previously in.  These are God's "tests of TIME". I've thought many times along the way, especially lately, "I think God might be a bit lost".  I'm finding that we can sometimes be in the bulls-eye of God's will for our lives and things make utterly no sense until that ugly, five-letter word. . .later.

Did you know that Christ also had to deal with the test of time?  Remember that He didn't perform His first miracle until He was 30 years old!  I'd like to say, God, you were running a little late there, don't you think? Considering Jesus only had three remaining years left in His earthly ministry?  NOPE. God was right on time. Even Jesus had to experience a season of preparation; of calling and anointing and sifting. These are not the fun parts, especially when we can taste the promised land and almost see it just around the bend of our lives. We're tired of being "on-hold". We're ready for the next step. We're desperate for Him to show up to our appointment already! Oh, how you and I miss the point of this time of waiting by wasting our time. We're not taking advantage of where we're "temporarily stalled" on our way to our ultimate place of purpose. God's not running late.  God created time and never wastes it. Unfortunately, we do waste it when we spend so much of our moments complaining about where we are and not preparing for where we will be.

Kids seem to teach me this lesson so often. They inevitably always want to be where they can get the most hurt. They want to play in the street, they want to touch the hot stove, and sometimes, they want to play in the backyard that is ridden with thorns and stickers. As parents, we want them to be able to play freely and enjoy the backyard. They could have so much fun out there, running and jumping and playing in the grass. The problem is, sometimes the grass isn't ready for them yet. It has to be tended to; mowed, treated for stickers, and rid of possible threats. No matter how well you try to explain it to your toddler, their desire to go outside in the backyard far outweighs the patience it will take to wait for you to ready the yard for them. So they kick and scream and throw an all-out tantrum about not being able to be in the very place that you wish they could be. . at the right time.

We are so much like our kids. Constantly throwing a fit because where we are isn't where we want to be.
Constantly thinking God is with-holding the best from us, when in reality, the "promised land" isn't ready yet. Or more precisely, WE are not ready for IT. The best way to prove to God that I'm prepared for the next phase is by being a good steward of my time right now.  I need to learn to bear fruit in the desert before He can trust me to create a garden in the promised land that He has for me. It's not a fun phase to be in, this test of time, but I'm going to grin and bear it. And try desperately not to tap my foot in annoyance and look at my watch every 5 seconds. God is getting the backyard ready. He is waiting for just the right time to lead me to the place He has for me. Patience, Michelle, and no tantrums. :)

2 comments:

  1. This is really good. I've been walking through some of this stuff as well.

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    1. Thank you. It's been weighing heavy on my mind lately too. Believing without seeing is the hardest thing I'm doing lately.

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